Safehouse Events

Berkeley, CA

The goal of this play party is to create a safe space where everyone is actively negotiating to acquire enthusiastic consent, while respecting the boundaries of others. Additionally, we strive for diversity and inclusion in gender, race, sexuality, and sexual preference.

How to attend?

If you have not attended and want to, please send a thoughtful direct message to PerfectTommy introducing yourself, to start the screening process. You should out at least a week before the party.

Why You May Want to Attend

  • No gendered pricing scheme
  • Everyone is screened for a detailed understanding of consent
  • We take consent violations seriously
  • The burden of a consent violation is on the person doing the offending action
  • We are committed to creating a safe space for everyone
  • Diversity and inclusion has been the goal from the start
  • The party is not about money, the cover charge keeps the event self-sustaining

Regarding COVID-19

Everyone attending must be fully vaccinated and able to show their vaccination card and state or federal identification. Temperature will be checked at the door and everyone must use hand sanitizer before entering.

Donations to Lower/Avoid Cover Charge

Here are some things you can opt to bring, in order of popularity:

  • Fruit, e.g. bananas, apples, oranges, grapes, etc.
  • Sandwiches
  • Chocolate
  • Cold platter of either: fruit, veggies, cheese, meats
  • Baked goods, cookies, cakes, etc.
  • Soft drinks, sparkling water
  • Compostable cutlery, drinking cups, plates (must be compostable)

We're don't accept donations of alcohol. This is a sober event.

If you want bring food to reduce/remove your entry fee, please coordinate with Sooosie more than 3 days before the event.

House Rules

  • Do not discuss what goes on at the party outside the party.
  • Respect everyone’s privacy and never reveal the identity of other attendees.
  • Acquire consent from anyone before interacting.
  • No cell phones out except in the garage or outside.
  • Be welcoming, kind, courteous, and respectful to everyone.
  • No smoking inside. (Smoking outside is fine.)
  • No shoes, drinks or food upstairs. (Water is okay.)
  • No play in the bathrooms.

Event Notes

  • Fetish/sexy wear encouraged but not required.
  • No jeans, sneakers or t-shirts. Dress to impress someone.
  • There's an opening circle to hear the rules, expectations and introduce yourself as well as your desires and boundaries.
  • The only way to get the address is to be screened. You can't be screened if you don't contact PerfectTommy.


If the cost is too high, please ask Sooosie about volunteering! It’s a great way to meet people and you'd have our gratitude. One hour of volunteer time gets you in free. Additional hours earn you a credit, which you can use at a future time or give to a friend.

We have positions for:

  • Set-up - Arrives at 6pm. Sets up rooms with supplies, towels, etc. moves furniture.
  • Monitors - Checks to ensure everyone is safe.
  • Clean-up - 1 hour from 2am to 3am. You are able to crash at the Safehouse and you get additional credit for you or a friend

In the comments section below, please place which volunteer roles interest you.

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